Courageous, a Movie About Dads. YESSSS!!!!

July 6, 2011

Culture

It’s with incredible joy that I read this news report about another up and coming movie from the Sherwood Films dudes. If you have never seen “Facing the Giants” or “Fireproof,” GO SEE THEM. Good, good movies. The same folks are making a new movie, “Courageous.” My kids have been talking about it for a few months now (they are always informed about these things). I don’t really pay much attention until the release of such movies is close at hand. “Courageous” is scheduled for a late September release. I’m very excited about it. Why? Because this movie depicts the challenges and importance of fathers. This strikes a very, very personal chord with me.

I grew up without knowing my real dad. I remember those days as a little girl, longing to know him, writing him long, lonely letters because I wanted to know who he was and who I was. My mother’s family, bitter about the divorce when I was just 2 years old, told me how awful he was, how poorly he treated my mom. When I finally met my dad when I was 30-something, he said he did indeed treat my mom terribly. He was a drunk and a cheat. She deserved better. He loved us so much, but it caused too much pain to contact us, especially when he learned my mom had remarried. He said he never contacted me because his own mother had said to leave us alone and let us live our lives.

That was probably the worst advice he could have received.

No matter how lousy a husband he was, he was still my dad. I should have had the chance to know him, to make those judgments for myself. To know that I was loved by my dad. He never even sent me a birthday card. I had no idea he even considered me or thought of me.

I had a difficult childhood. I know not all fatherless children have hard childhoods. My stepdad did try his best, but he was a rather violent man. And when he and my mom split up, he admitted that he cared nothing for me and didn’t want me. That was another big blow for an insecure and battered teenager. It took me a long time to get over that.

Anyway, I have come to the conclusion that children need their dads. Dads are so very, very important. They are often overlooked because it’s the moms who do all the grunt work in raising the kids. The dads seem to just go to work, come home and watch TV and float around periodically in their kids’ lives. But technically, that’s not being a “dad.” That’s akin to what Dr. Laura calls a “sperm donor.” Dads are an essential increment in the family, not just a provider and certainly not just a gigilo for the needy woman.

Being a dad is not easy, especially in a culture that glorifies “hooking up,” adultery, and profligate irresponsibility. Dads need support, but dads also need to buck up and take responsibility. I think a heck of a lot of the cultural problems in our culture stem from absentee dads or dads disengaged from family life. I’m not the only fatherless child out there who has noticed it.

So I’m pretty excited about “Courageous.” The tagline for the movie is “Honor begins at home.” It sure does. Here’s a trailer from the movie.

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6 Responses to “Courageous, a Movie About Dads. YESSSS!!!!”

  1. bingkaycoy Says:

    Is this an upcoming movie? I’m so sorry to hear about your life without knowing your dad. I have a father and he is a wonderful one. But I never grew close to him because I feared him. But I know he loved me so much. Afterall, I was the only girl for 16 years before my sister was born.
    No matter how imperfect our fathers are, they are still our fathers who gave us life.

  2. Karen and Gerard Says:

    Sounds like a good movie. I agree with you that dad’s are very important to the family unit and certainly, you should have been allowed to get to know your dad and make your own decision about how much contact to have with him. That is very sad. I am so thankful I had both a great mom and dad!

  3. The Other Alice Says:

    As I’ve said before… the trailer alone made me want to be a dad! With one of those cool uniforms!

  4. Beth Says:

    I saw the coming attractions to this somewhere, it looks amazing. I also had a very complicated relationship with my Dad, so I really appreciated this post.

  5. lin Says:

    Dads play a big part of our development and who we turn out to be–no matter if they are m.i.a. or involved in our lives.

    My dad died when I was 7 and that had a huge impact on me. I had great dad role models in my life, but I never experienced that relationship because I don’t remember it much. I mean, I think he loved me and I remember him being good to me, but that is it. My mom has pretty much iconized him over the years.

    I watch my husband with my daughter and I see how self-assured she is with guys because her dad loves her and is so good to her. I think that plays a HUGE part of a girl’s life–how her dad treats her.

    So, yeah, I’m with ya–while the mom has the everyday job of raising us (well, they did–back in the day), I think dad’s play a big role in our confidence and our relationships with men. I think ideally, everyone needs a mom and a dad….IF they are good moms and dads.

    Life is complicated, isn’t it?

  6. Secondary Roads Says:

    Dad’s are important in the lives of their sons and daughters. It is so easy to get caught up in the “good provider” role, that more important matters can be missed.